


o trespass sweetly urged

by colazitron



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: F/M, M/M, if you (like me) worry: there's no cheating in this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-04
Updated: 2017-05-04
Packaged: 2018-10-28 04:05:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10823400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/colazitron/pseuds/colazitron
Summary: 4 times Jonas and Isak don't kiss and 1 time they do





	o trespass sweetly urged

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer:** I am in no way affiliated with the characters depicted herein or their creators. I made all of this up in my head and am sharing it purely for entertainment purposes.
> 
> **A/N:** Listen, I WANTED to make this "four times they kissed and one time they didn't" but this happened instead.

**1\. “Don't you want to know what it's like?”**

Isak is nine years old, and life is pretty chill. He got all sixes in his end of year report card yesterday, and Mamma and Pappa took him out for ice cream because it was a beautiful day and their beautiful boy deserved it. Today he's sleeping over at his best friend's house because Mamma and Pappa are going away for the night, and they had ice cream after dinner _again_. Isak's not sure if Mamma and Pappa would approve of ice cream for desert two days in a row, but Isak does, and so when Jonas' mamma offered him a second scoop of ice cream with a wink, he wasn't about to turn her down, now was he.

He's maybe regretting it a little right now, because between all the crisps they had in the afternoon and the huge dinner Jonas' mamma made  _and_ all the ice cream  _and_ all the Fanta they were allowed to have for dinner – well, Isak's tummy is a little queasy, is all. Not throw-up queasy, ew, but lie-on-your-back-and-stare-at-the-glow-in-the-dark-stars-on-Jonas'-ceiling-a-bit-too-hard queasy.

“Hey, Isak?” Jonas whispers from where he's lying on the bed, to the left of Isak and a little higher up than he is on the guest mattress. “Are you asleep?”

“No,” Isak whispers back. “What is it?”

“Can I tell you a secret? You can't tell anyone,” Jonas whispers again.

Isak immediately rolls over, queasy tummy or not, to find Jonas at the edge of his bed, his dark eyes twinkling down at him in the dim light that spills in through his curtains.

“I promise,” Isak says.

Jonas hesitates a bit.

“Do you want to come up in the bed?” he asks, instead of whatever his secret is.

Isak throws off the  duvet and crawls into bed next to Jonas when he shuffles back to make room for him. It's a little harder now than when they were six, and they giggle as their knees bump into each other. Isak's back isn't entirely covered by  Jonas' duvet and he can feel the cool air on it, but Jonas is super warm in front of him, so it's fine. He won't sleep in bed with Jonas anyway. Once Jonas told him his secret he'll go back to the mattress on the floor.

“You really can't tell anyone, Isak,” Jonas repeats.

Isak huffs an impatient breath.

“Who would I even tell? You're my best friend,” he says.

Jonas grins. “You're my best friend too.”

Isak waits a little bit longer, and Jonas shuffles a little further down under the  duvet , like he wants to hide himself and his secret away. If Isak hadn't been on tenterhooks ever since Jonas mentioned the word 'secret' he definitely is now.

“Okay, so. You know Malin?”

“From our class?” Isak asks.

“Yeah,” Jonas says, still hushed.

“Yeah. What about her?”

Jonas frets for a bit longer, and then says, “She's cute. Right?”

“Cute?” Isak echoes. He's not sure why he didn't assume this secret was about a girl. Of course it's about a girl Jonas likes, they're nine and eight now. Almost everyone in class has been whispering about someone liking someone.

“Yeah. Like, when she has her hair in that braid with the bow? It's really pretty, right?” Jonas goes on. “And, like. Her freckles. Those are cute, I think.”

“Um, yeah,” Isak says.

Jonas nudges him with his knee.

“What, you don't think she's pretty?” he asks, sounding a bit offended on her behalf.

Isak laughs and nudges him back.

“You want me to have a crush on the same girl as you?” he asks back and they both giggle into what little space there is between them. Jonas has _a crush._

“Nooo,” Jonas says. “You're right. It's better if you don't.”

“Yeah,” Isak agrees. “She'd obviously pick me.”

“Hah! No she wouldn't. You're shorter than me.”

“So? I'm older,” Isak points out. “I bet I'll end up taller than you again.”

“Do you like someone?” Jonas asks, instead of answering Isak's claim in any way.

Isak hesitates a bit. He thinks of all the girls in their class, with their ponytails and colourful dresses, and finally shrugs.

“Um, no,” he says.

“Okay,” Jonas says. “But you'll tell me when you do, right?”

“Yeah,” Isak promises, and yawns. His eyes suddenly feel a lot heavier. He should probably get back down on the floor.

“Isak?” Jonas says again.

“Hm?” Isak hums, not bothering to open his eyes.

“What do you think kissing is like?”

“What?” he asks, eyes back open almost immediately.

“I don't know,” Jonas says, looking down so he doesn't have to meet Isak's eyes. “Just… what do you think it's like?”

“Do you want to kiss Malin?” Isak asks. “Like, on the lips?”

“Maybe,” Jonas says.

“Ew,” Isak says, before he can really form the thought.

Jonas nudges him with his knee again, but he's also laughing, so Isak laughs as well.

“What do you mean 'ew', don't you want to know what it's like?” he asks.

Isak shrugs and thinks about it for a moment.

“I mean. Maybe. Maybe when I actually like someone,” he concedes. “But, like, won't there be a lot of spit and things?”

“Ew,” Jonas says.

“See!” Isak says, a little too loudly.

Jonas laughs and shushes him, and they slip further under the duvet and hold their breath for a moment, just in case Jonas' mamma heard them and comes in to tell them to stop talking and go to sleep. She doesn't, and so they relax again.

“But, like, I'm sure if you do it right there isn't spit,” Jonas says. “It doesn't look like there's spit when Mamma and Pappa kiss.”

Isak wrinkles his nose. Does Jonas watch his mamma and pappa kiss? Isak's own parents don't kiss much, but even when they do, it's not like Isak looks particularly hard.

“I'm sure we could do it right,” Jonas says, confident.

“You and Malin?”

“No, me and you! To see what it's like,” Jonas says.

Isak giggles and draws his knees up when his tummy flutters again, that annoying queasy thing, accidentally bumping into Jonas' legs again.

“Why would you want to kiss me? I have freckles, so if I put a bow in my hair, would you think I'm pretty too?” he asks, teasing a little.

Jonas giggles with him and gives him a little shove.

“I don't _want_ to! But, like, just to know if it's really gross or not,” he says.

“I don't want your spit on me,” Isak says, wrinkling his nose again.

Jonas giggles some more and then yawns a big yawn that Isak can't help but echo. He should probably go back to his mattress on the floor, but he's so comfy right now. He'll go in a moment.

“Thanks for keeping my secret,” Jonas mumbles sleepily

Isak reaches out  his hand under the duvet.

“'f course,” he mumbles back. “Y're my best friend.”

Jonas grabs his hand when Isak finds it and holds on.

“Yeah.”

  


** 2\. “ But what if she thinks I'm terrible?” **

Isak is fifteen and waiting by the bike racks outside school for Jonas. School let out fifteen minutes ago, but Jonas wants to ask Ingrid to be his girlfriend today, so here Isak is, waiting. Jonas better actually do it, because Isak would really rather go over to Jonas' and play some FIFA already.  He's fiddling with his phone, but there's nothing interesting on instagram or anywhere, just the same photos Eva and Sara posted together yesterday.

When he catches movement out of the corner of his eye, he glances up, but it's only Sara. She's looking over at him and when Isak smiles at her she lifts her hand and waves at him, waggling her fingers and giggling a little. Sara's almost always in a good mood, and Isak can't help but smile back at her a little more openly. Sara changes her path then, walks over to him, so Isak puts his phone back in his backpack.

“Hi, Isak,” she says, when she comes to stand in front of him. “Are you waiting for Jonas?”

“Yeah,” he says, shrugging a little with a small grin. Ingrid would have definitely told Sara that Jonas asked to speak to her after school, and they probably all know what it's about as well. Jonas hasn't exactly been subtle with the way he's been complimenting her, and the actual flowers he brought her last week, Jesus.

Sara grins up at him and pushes a strand of her hair behind her ear. It's long, and sleek, and glints in the sun. Isak's always liked it.

“Ingrid's gonna say yes,” she says, conspiratorially like she's imparting a secret. She is, sort of, Isak supposes. He's going to find out soon anyway, but technically it's probably a secret that Sara's not supposed to tell him.

“Jonas'll be thrilled,” he says.

“She has such a crush on him,” Sara says, laughing a little as though the idea is ridiculous.

“Jonas is great,” Isak says, a little defensive.

“Oh, no, that's not what I meant!” she hurries to say, looking down at her shoes and then back up at him. That piece of hair has slipped from behind her ear again, so she reaches up to tuck it back in. Isak doesn't get why girls put up with wearing their hair out of braids or ponytails.

“I just meant… he's nice and all, but he's not who I'd have a crush on,” she says. She's smiling up at him from underneath her lashes a bit and Isak's about to shrug cause, yeah, Ingrid isn't who _he'd_ have a crush on either when-- oh. Oh, Sara's flirting, isn't she?

“No?” he asks, butterflies batting their wings against the inside of his belly and throat suddenly so dry he has to swallow against it.

Sara smiles, seemingly content that he caught on to what she meant.

“No,” she confirms.

Before Isak has to figure out what exactly he's supposed to say to that, the door to the school opens across the schoolyard, and Ingrid and Jonas walk out – not quite holding hands, but bumping into each other with how close they are.

“They're cute,” Sara says, turned away from Isak to watch them walk over to them.

“Yeah,” Isak says, throat still as dry, no matter how much he swallows.

Sara turns back around to him and cocks her head a little in a way that makes that piece of hair slip back out from her ear again. This time she doesn't reach up to tuck it back, just smiles at him.

“Well. See you around, Isak,” she says.

He only has time for another “yeah” before she's turning away and meeting Ingrid halfway, linking their arms as Ingrid breaks away from Jonas, heads bent together and whispering between themselves immediately.

Jonas looks a little shy and immensely pleased when he comes to stand in front of Isak. For a moment, neither of them say anything, then Isak smiles, big, and claps a hand on Jonas' shoulder.

“Congrats, bro,” he says, and Jonas laughs, loud and happy.

  


“We kissed on the stairwell a bit,” Jonas says into the quiet of his room later when Isak's bent over his maths homework and Jonas is supposed to be writing his report for Norwegian class. Isak looks up, unsurprised to see Jonas staring into the air instead, a small smile on his face.

“Was there a lot of spit?” Isak asks, teasing.

Jonas grabs his pillow from his bed and throws it at Isak. Isak laughs and puts it in his lap, on top of his notebook.

“Shut up,” Jonas says. “There wasn't any spit.”

“Not any? That doesn't sound too exciting,” Isak goes on, pulling his feet out of reach quickly when Jonas lunges for him. Jonas knows exactly just how ticklish he is and he's never once been above using it against Isak. Jonas tries to wrestle the pillow from him, but Isak holds fast, and by the time they're both out of breath and calmed down again, there's an unseemly crease in Isak's notebook. Oh, well. He'll just put it underneath his dictionaries and the atlas over night. It'll be fine.

“Do you think she thought it was boring?” Jonas asks, suddenly frowning.

“What, the kissing?” Isak asks.

“Yeah,” Jonas mumbles and shrugs.

Isak looks at him incredulously. “How should I know, I wasn't there.”

Jonas rolls his eyes.

“But, like. If there wasn't any… spit. You think she wanted me to-- like---?”

“Put your tongue in her mouth?” Isak says, trying to suppress the way his nose wants to wrinkle at the thought. “I don't know, man, she's your girlfriend.”

“You've kissed more girls than me, though,” Jonas points out.

“I've kissed two girls,” Isak says. “And I was twelve! There wasn't any spit, let me tell you.”

Jonas laughs a bit but then sighs again.

“I just don't want to do it wrong, you know,” he says, flushing a bit. It makes his eyes sparkle when he looks down like that with that expression on his face. Between Jonas and him, Isak gets why Ingrid has a crush on Jonas, no matter if Sara agrees or not.

“I'm sure you're not doing it wrong,” Isak says.

“But what if she thinks I'm terrible?” Jonas insists.

“You've kissed her once! And she hasn't dumped you yet, so I doubt she thinks you're awful,” Isak says. “I don't think you really can do it wrong, anyway.”

Jonas groans, faceplanting into his duvet by Isak's leg. Isak awkwardly reaches out and pats him on the back.

“I just really like her, you know. I should've just kissed some random girls for practice like you,” he says.

Isak snorts a laugh. “I didn't kiss those girls for practice. And it was all super chaste anyway, I doubt I'm any better at it than you.”

Jonas rolls over and sighs up at the ceiling.

“So we both need practice,” he says.

Isak laughs. “I don't have a girlfriend to impress,” he points out.

“Yeah, but Sara likes you,” Jonas says. “She was totally flirting with you when we came outside, admit it.”

“I mean,” Isak says, stuttering a bit over his suddenly dry again throat and the nervous horde of fluttering thins in his belly. “I guess, yeah.”

“She's cute,” Jonas says, carefully, like he's waiting for Isak to confirm it.

“Yeah,” Isak says again. Sara is pretty. She's funny and smart too.

“So maybe you do need to practice too,” Jonas says, grinning up at him and waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

“What?” Isak asks, laughing a little nervously as the butterflies start fluttering even more aggressively.

“I'm just saying...” Jonas sing-songs and trails off into making obnoxious kissy-faces, complete with sound effects.

Isak grabs the pillow from where it's fallen down the side of the bed during their earlier wrestle and whacks Jonas in the face with it.

“I'm not kissing you, bro, I already told you!”

Jonas pulls the pillow back off his face and laughs loudly, before getting up and chasing Isak into another wrestling match by puckering his lips right in his face,  no matter how Isak twists and turns to get away from him.  And m aybe also from those goddamn butterflies in his belly  that just won't stop their stupid fluttering.

  


** 3\. “ We do it all the time!” **

Isak is sixteen, the room is way too hot, and the beer in his hand isn't even cold anymore. He's not sure he's going to keep drinking it, actually. He likes how it makes his head softer and his shoulders looser, but he doesn't particularly like how it tastes, especially warm.

“Come dance!” Eva shouts in his face as she appears from out of nowhere to pull at his beer-free arm.

“What, no,” Isak tries to protest, but Eva's got quite the hold on him and she's already plucking the warm beer can out of his hand and setting it down on the coffee table behind him.

Eva's eyes are rimmed in black the way she's started doing it recently, and Isak thinks she looks better without it. But Eva clearly likes it, and so do quite a few of the boys in their year, so he just nods vaguely whenever she puts on her makeup and asks him what it looks like.

When Sara broke up with him for 'not putting in enough effort', Eva refused to stop being friends with him, and while Isak has a growing suspicion it's more to do with the fact that Eva really likes spending time with Jonas, especially when Ingrid isn't there, he likes her. She's easy to be around. After a while Sara even stopped glaring at him and started treating him like a human again, instead of an ex boyfriend. Eva told him once that she was upset that Isak hadn't seemed upset at all when Sara broke it off, but truth was – Isak wasn't all that upset. He liked Sara, but it was exhausting, keeping up with her and what she wanted from him. It felt too much like a constant guessing game, and one he was constantly getting wrong.

On top of that, no matter how much he likes Sara's shiny hair, he can't help but admire Jonas' wild mop more. No matter how much she flutters her eyelashes at him, he still secretly thinks that mischievous sparkle in Jonas ' when he hurls himself down a ramp at the skate park is prettier. He knows he's not supposed to get butterflies around his best friend, not  _those_ butterflies, but Isak can't help it. So it's probably for the best that Sara broke up with him, all things considered.

Eva drags him into the thick of the dancing crowd, close to where Jonas has his arms wrapped around Ingrid, her back to his chest, swaying a little out of beat with a song that's really not made for slow-dancing. Isak feels Eva's hand tighten a little on his wrist. He's not sure she knows he can tell.

“What's up with you two slowpokes!” she laughs at them. “This is a bop, you need to _dance_!”

Ingrid laughs and lets Eva grab her hands, pulling her out of Jonas' hold and closer to Eva. Sara pops up next to them – or maybe she was already there – and the three of them shake their hair at each other and sing in each other's faces, while Jonas grins at Isak with a shrug.

Eva wraps her arms around Ingrid and Sara's shoulder, pulling them close, and Sara sways in closer, mouth landing on Eva's cheek and then her mouth.

Isak still flushes hotly every time he sees them do this, though it's nothing new anymore. And it doesn't seem to bother anyone else.

Well, Ingrid laughs and stumbles back over to Jonas. Plenty of the boys around them stare at them in undisguised interest and a few of the girls roll their eyes at the display. But somehow Isak just knows that none of them have those uncomfortably squirming feelings slithering around inside their guts. Probably because none of them have crushes on their best friends. At least Eva has a crush on her best friend's  _boyfriend_ , though you wouldn't know it by the way she's wrapping her arms around Sara's neck and kissing her deeply. Isak's not sure  _he_ ever kissed Sara like that, which. Yeah. That's probably what she meant by him not putting any effort into it.

Sara and Eva open their mouths a bit more, let people get a glimpse of how their tongues tangle, and start giggling and break apart when one of the boys around them lets out a loud whoop.

“You're shameless,” Ingrid giggles at them.

Eva tosses her hair over her shoulder, and Isak doesn't miss the way she glances at Jonas, just very quickly. Recently, Isak thinks, Jonas may have started glancing back, and Isak isn't sure he can stop this particular train wreck from happening. They're all good so far, even with him and Sara being broken up, but he doesn't think Ingrid would take kindly to Jonas dumping her for Eva. And Sara doesn't take kindly to anything that hurts Ingrid, not even if that something's Eva, probably.

“It's so unfair boys never put on a show for us though,” Eva says, wrapping her arms around Isak's neck instead of Sara's. Isak automatically grabs her waist to steady her.

“True,” Sara says.

“What?” Jonas asks, laughing a little.

“What?” Sara asks back. “It's cute when guys kiss. Girls like it just as much as boys like when girls do it.”

“If you say so,” Jonas says, a little incredulous, and catches Isak's gaze. Isak shrugs dutifully, as if he can't possibly imagine why someone would want to see such a thing, and doesn't notice Eva gearing up to give him a giant push before she does, sending him stumbling into Jonas.

“Yeah, you owe us,” she crows, and Sara laughs.

“We do it all the time! It's not weird,” she adds.

“Oi, that's my boyfriend,” Ingrid interjects, but she's laughing too.

Jonas is steadying Isak as he finds his balance again, and Isak does his best not to linger in the touch.

“Yeah, Eva. If you wanted to kiss me all you had to do is ask,” Isak says, grinning through the shivering in his heart and the cold flash at the back of his neck at the thought that Jonas might actually suggest they go along with it.

Instead, Jonas laughs. Sara looks a little grumpy, but Isak can't feel anything  about that over the harsh thundering of his heart .

“Sorry, Isak,” Eva says, patting his chest affectionately. “I'm gonna stick with Sara.”

J onas laughs again, like maybe Isak's supposed to feel insulted instead of a tiny little bit relieved.

Isak grins and shrugs it off.

“That's probably a good choice,” he says. Sara's eyes soften a little at it, and when the song changes, she pulls Eva closer again, the two of them yelling lyrics in each others' faces. Ingrid snuggles back into Jonas' arms, and Isak lets himself be pushed out of the crowd by the movement of everyone else around him.

He needs some air.

  


** 4\. “ I think it'd be so hot. ” **

Isak should probably feel bad over how he split his knuckles open on another guy's face, but he got repaid in a bloody lip and at least he didn't smash a bottle over anyone's head, Christ. Those Yakuza assholes had it coming, but William is still going to be in deep shit if it gets out, and Isak's not about to stick his neck out for him. He's got enough shit to worry about without getting involved with the police, fuck.

“You want to smoke?” Jonas asks from next to him where they're lying on Jonas' bed side by side, legs dangling off the side of it.

“Yeah,” Isak says.

They're both a little rattled, he thinks. It's a good thing Jonas' mamma isn't home so they could clean up the worst of their bruises. Jonas mostly got hit in the chest, so he might just get away with it if Isak gets out of here fast enough to be unseen, but Jonas isn't kicking him out yet, and Isak can't face the prospect of going back to Eskild's basement. Much as he's grateful for it, staying there makes him want to curl up and cry into the early hours of the morning.

Jonas gets up, digging through his drawer full of phone chargers and other random electronics crap, and finally pulls out a pre-rolled blunt. He locks his door even though only his sister's home and covers the crack under it with a towel. Isak supposes he should be helpful and gets up to open the window. It's warm out.

Jonas grabs his lighter and lies back down on his bed, taking the first drag from the blunt before he passes it over to Isak.  For a while, they smoke in silence.

“I always wanted to shotgun with Eva,” Jonas then says into the silence.

Isak makes a vague humming noise.

“I think it'd be so hot,” Jonas goes on, and Isak makes another vague noise.

“Isabel won't do it either, she says it's unhealthy.”

Isak doesn't have to see Jonas to know he's rolling his eyes, and smiles to himself a little. A little while ago he suddenly realised there's no part of him that wants to offer to shotgun with Jonas in their stead anymore. He's not sure when that happened, but he wishes fiercely it had happened earlier. If he hadn't got so caught up in his various jealousies maybe Eva--

Whatever. It doesn't matter what Isak does or feels now, the past is going to stay exactly like it is. He's made his fucking bed and now he's got to lie in it.

He has no idea why Eva hasn't told Jonas yet.

“I think Isabel's gonna break up with me,” Jonas says, taking the blunt back from Isak.

“What? What makes you think that?” Isak asks. Isabel and Jonas aren't like Eva and Jonas at all. Isabel always seemed quite chill. Like she was just having a good time. There was nothing of the underlying drama that hung around Eva and Jonas like a storm cloud.

“Just a feeling. She doesn't like the smoking either. Or the fighting.”

“You're not fighting. You got into _a fight_ ,” Isak points out.

“And I went back for more,” Jonas sighs.

“I asked you to,” Isak mumbles, taking the joint back.

“Yeah,” Jonas says, slowly.

Silence settles between them again, until Jonas fumbles for the blunt, poking Isak in the cheek in passing, making him huff an exhausted laugh.

“I'd do it again if you asked again,” Jonas says, then takes a long drag.

“Yeah,” Isak sighs. He knows.

“You're my best friend,” he says instead of anything else.

“Yeah,” Jonas agrees.

Isak should feel more remorse, probably, for all the people he's hurt in the last few months, be it physically or emotionally. But some days it's hard to feel anything and he's glad he even got up out of bed at all. If you can call the slightly shady mattress in the basement a bed, that is.  The remorse is still there. Still bites at him every time he sees Eva laugh with Noora and her new friends. Still makes him duck his head whenever Sara catches his eye and pointedly looks away – again.  And Jonas… ha. Well. He's quite sure the day he tells Jonas about what he did the shame is probably going to swallow him up whole and spit him back out a lot smaller.

But for now, with his knuckles bruised, his lip split, his cheek aching vaguely, and the weed settling a cotton candy cloud in his head, Isak doesn't feel anything other than a vague sort of… blank.

“Fuck, I'm horny,” Jonas says, because it's the kind of thing you can say when you've just gotten beat up with your best friend and are smoking up together in your bedroom.

Isak laughs.

“I'm not shotgunning with you either,” he says.

Jonas laughs and punches him in the shoulder, harder than he should, and they both wince at it.

“You're a dick,” Jonas says. “You should be so lucky.”

  


** +1. “ Everyone should get to kiss their first love, if given the chance.” **

I t's still light out, and Isak has never loved the  long June days  more than he does now, he thinks.  Summer in Oslo has always been a thing to look forward to, for him, but this summer feels especially bright. It's not as if it's anything special really, but there's still a certain weight that feels like it's been lifted from his  shoulders. He's sure uni's going to settle that right back there once he goes back in the fall, but until then… until then he's decided he's just going to be happy. It's his twentieth birthday, he's been successfully living with his boyfriend for over two years now – ha, by the way, eat your hearts out, naysayers – and somehow, through all the ups and downs, all his friends are still his friends.

The drama didn't stop with secondary school, but then  again,  that's fine.  That might just be life. Isak's sort of gotten used to the way their little group gets tangled and messes up. They've all come out closer for it  anyway . Ingrid and Sara are back to hanging out with them, and he's pretty sure this time when Sara and Eva start making out at parties it's not just for attention. At least not for attention from anyone but each other.  Even's firmly entrenched in his old friend group again as well, and Isak delights in very few things the way he does in getting Mikael and Yousef to tell him all the things that they got up to  in their wild teenage youth, as  Elias likes to call it. They're long past secret  shame , and the stories shared now are all of the funny anecdotal kind.

I sak is happy. He's a bit drunk, and he's surrounded by all of his closest friends, all because they're glad they spent another year of his life with him, and Isak is… happy.

“How does it feel finally being able to go clubbing with your boyfriend?” Mikael teases, stretching his leg out so he can nudge Isak in the side where they're all sat around on Isak and Even's living room floor, the furniture pushed back to the walls to make more room.

Isak laughs and rolls his eyes.

“Don't remind him, he'll be dragging me out from now on,” he says.

Even snorts a laugh behind him, hugging Isak closer against his chest.

“Since when do I go clubbing, baby?”

Isak laughs and turns his head around to stare at Even. “You're definitely more likely to go clubbing than I am, _baby_.”

Even grins and presses a giddy-firm kiss to his lips.

“Only sometimes,” he says. “We're gonna have to stick with netflix and chill for most evenings.”

“Such a shame,” Isak drawls, twisting his body around more fully, getting on his knees in between Even's spread legs so he can pull Even into a _real_ kiss, with soft lips and teasing tongues and going on for probably way longer than is strictly polite. But Even's hair is soft in between his fingers, and Even's hands are gentle and firm on his hips, and Isak doesn't want to pull away before he's had his fill.

Whatever. It's his birthday. His friends can deal.

“No need to show off, Isak,” Mahdi calls, somewhat predictably. Isak flips him off over his shoulder and kisses Even some more, just because he can. Even laughs against his lips and goes along with it.

“Come on, Even, you don't have to indulge him in everything!” Magnus complains, but Isak can hear him laugh, so.

“It's his birthday, I'm definitely going to indulge him if he wants kisses,” Even says, smiling at Isak sweetly before leaning in again. Their grins fit together like puzzle pieces, if you ask Isak.

“That's true,” Isak hears Mikael say from beside them. “The birthday boy should have kisses.”

Something about his tone raises a vague sense of alarm in the back of Isak's mind, but then Even pulls him a bit closer by the hip and he doesn't really care.

So it's definitely not his fault that he yelps in surprise when Mikael suddenly throws himself at him, tipping him over sideways, and pressing messy kisses all over Isak's face.

Even, the traitor, laughs, while Mikael crows, “Kisses for the birthday boy!”

Before Isak knows it, he's buried underneath at least four of his friends, all pressing too-wet kisses to his face and hands. His cries for help are going unheeded as Even laughs, still buried somewhere underneath Isak, and finally Isak decides to sit still and let it happen. The rest of the group have joined in with Magnus, Mikael, Eskild and Eva's raucousness, and one after another they all press kisses to Isak's cheeks and forehead, barely leaving him any space to breathe. Isak dutifully pretends to hate it, and glares at them all, fighting down his grin. So his cheeks are probably stained with at least five different shades of red and pink and – is Sana wearing black today? Lovely.

It all just goes to show that Isak is loved and he's just sentimental and just drunk enough to revel in it.

Eva presses a final smacking, glitter-glossy kiss to his mouth before he can react and laughs at him when she sees his startled face.

“You're incorrigible,” Isak says, and lets her bat his hand away when he raises it to wipe off the sticky mess on his lips.

There's only Jonas left now, and he winks at Isak.

“Can't turn me down this time,” he says, and Isak wants to roll his eyes at him, but laughs a little instead.

“Just get it over with,” he says.

Jonas leans in and presses a kiss to his cheek, far sweeter than any of the others.

“Happy birthday, Issy,” he says.

Isak feels his – sticky, what the hell, how do girls do this? – lips twitch up into a grin.

“Thanks,” he says.

“Wait,” Eva interjects. “You turned Jonas down when he wanted to kiss you?”

Isak does a good impression of a deer in headlights at the comment. Jonas laughs.

“He was worried there'd be too much spit,” he teases.

“Excuse me, I was nine years old, it was a legitimate worry, okay,” Isak huffs, resisting the urge to fold his hands in front of his chest.

“I'm sure you don't mind a bit of spit now,” Magnus pipes up, and Isak flips him off.

“He doesn't,” Even laughs from behind him, and Isak reaches behind himself to shove at Even blindly. Even just catches his hand and laces their fingers together, and Isak finds he doesn't really mind.

“Well,” Jonas says, with a dramatic sigh. “I suppose I missed my chance there, otherwise I'd give you a kiss for a birthday present.”

Then he pinches Isak's cheek.

“Thanks,” Isak deadpans. “Your generosity truly knows no bounds.”

“You know me,” Jonas says with a slow shrug. “Free love and all.”

This time Isak does roll his eyes.

“You're an idiot is what you are,” he says.

Jonas laughs, and Even wraps his arms around Isak's middle to draw him back into his chest again, so Isak ducks his head to the side to be cuddled in more easily.

Even kisses his temple, and then says, lowly, so that the others probably can't hear, “If you wanted to kiss him, I wouldn't mind.”

Isak freezes for a moment and then whirls around.

“Excuse me?” he says, far too loudly, brow furrowed deeply.

Even smiles at him serenely, like he hasn't just--

“Everyone should get to kiss their first love, if given the chance,” he says with a shrug.

“Um, I don't care if you ever run into you first love again, you're not kissing them,” Isak says.

Even, because he's a dick who doesn't care that Isak's heart is racing and his head is playing a loop of 'what the fuck?', laughs.

“I dated my first love for four years, babe, it went a little past kissing,” he says with that twinkle in his eyes that means he vaguely enjoys Isak's racing heart and what-the-fuck-ing head.

“Good for you,” Isak says.

Even laughs again. “Good god, you don't have to.”

“I won't,” Isak says, still frowning.

Even's expression softens and he brings his hands up to cradle Isak's face, stroke his hair away from his forehead and draw him into a sweet kiss. Isak refuses to give in at first, but when Even's thumbs stroke over his cheeks and he kisses him a second time, he can feel his shoulders sag, and he kisses Even back a little.

“I'm sorry if that was too far,” Even says, quietly again. Isak doesn't even want to think about their audience.

He sighs a little and nods.

“I just thought it would be fun for you. Nostalgia. Closure. I don't know,” Even goes on.

Isak frowns again and puts a hand against Even's chest, pushing him a little.

“It's closed,” he says, emphatically.

Even laughs a little at that. “I know that. Baby, I know that. I'm not worried. You're not in love with Jonas, are you?”

Isak shakes his head, even though it was probably a rhetorical question.

“But you're in love with me,” Even says, and it's not even a question this time. Isak nods anyway, staring at how Even's eyes glitter at him happily and he sort of wants to kick everyone out and be just the two of them. Sorry, friends, you're nice and all, but Isak has a wonderful boyfriend to enjoy, so.

“So if you're curious, or if you want to do this for fifteen year old Isak who would die at the thought, that's fine. Go for it,” Even says. Then he grabs the back of Isak's neck, leans in, and whispers, “Also, it'd be kinda hot.”

When Even pulls back and quirks an eyebrow at him, Isak's pretty sure his mouth has dropped open in surprise. But there's no hint of a lie in Even's face, instead his eyes have gone a bit darker, and he nods his head a little to where Jonas is probably still sat behind Isak.

Tomorrow, Isak's going to blame it on the alcohol – oh, who is he kidding, he's blaming it on the alcohol right now – but he whirls around and determinately stares Jonas in the face.

“You started this, you only have yourself to blame,” Isak says.

“Technically, Mikael started this,” Jonas says, pointing a finger vaguely towards where Mikael is sitting.

“Bro, I don't even know what's happening right now, don't drag me into this,” Mikael says.

Isak ignores him and grabs Jonas' face to pull him closer and into a kiss. He means to be determined about it, but at the last moment he chickens out and so their lips meet only barely. Softly.

“Oh my god,” he hears Eva say.

Jonas chuckles against his mouth, and Isak grins back. He's still got his eyes open, but he can't make anything out other than a blur of dark that's Jonas' hair, and a blur of dark that's Jonas' open eyes, so he closes his own, shifts a hand to the back of Jonas' neck, and tilts his head a little to kiss him better. Jonas moves with him, and then suddenly they're actually kissing, instead of just pressing their lips together.

Isak's pretty sure he hears Eva say, “oh my god” again, so he nudges Jonas with his nose as a heads-up and opens his mouth. He's pretty sure he can feel Jonas grin against him before he follows Isak's lead. Isak hasn't kissed a lot of people, but the last two years have given him a not insignificant amount of practice, so when he draws Jonas' tongue into his mouth and Jonas makes a surprised sound, he feels a little smug. It probably helps that Even's left one hand on his hip and is chuckling behind him, close enough that he can probably watch them over Isak's shoulder.

It's that thought – and the three or four beers that are warming Isak's blood – that makes Isak keep his mouth a little open, just enough to turn it into a bit of a show, but it's also… it's good. Jonas is a good kisser. Isak really didn't expect to enjoy himself, but Jonas isn't shy. He doesn't fight Isak on where this kiss is going, but he has no trouble keeping up, and Isak lets his hand settle a little more into the thick hair at the base of his neck and hold him steady. Jonas makes another sound and Isak kisses him a little harder.

Fifteen year old Isak truly would die if he knew this was going to happen some day.

When Isak pulls back, Jonas is smiling at him. The skin above his upper lip glitters a little and it takes Isak a moment to remember that that's Eva's lip gloss, and not just spit. He can't help but grin at the thought. Who'd ever have thought he'd leave traces of Eva's gloss on Jonas' mouth? Not Isak, that's for sure.

“There,” Isak says, like he's completed some unpleasant chore, and Jonas laughs at him, pushes him backwards so he falls into Even.

“Ass,” Jonas says, but he's still grinning at Isak, so he thinks he probably doesn't mean it all that much. Isak holds his gaze and feels his cheeks suddenly flush as he remembers that literally all of their friends were watching that, that Even was watching that (that Even said it'd be a little hot to see)--

“I changed my mind, I totally claim responsibility for that,” Mikael says, and just like that the strange atmosphere that settled over the room is broken, and everyone's laughing again.

Jonas shuffles back to where he'd been sitting with Noora, and Isak settles back against Even again, slumping down a little to make it work.

“You okay?” Even asks, quietly enough that Isak's sure no one can hear it over the chatter that's suddenly started up again.

“Yeah,” Isak says, and squeezes back when Even squeezes his hand.

He's good. He's still a little drunk, and he's still with his best friends. There's still cake in the fridge and some leftover pizza from earlier. He got to kiss his first love and he'll get to kiss his current love a lot more later.

Isak is definitely good.

He laces his fingers with Even's, and with his free hand he wipes the rest of Eva's gloss off.

  


**The End**

**Author's Note:**

> Thoughts? Let me know down below! :D


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